This is Where I've Been At.

So, where has Lori-Grace been the last, oh, month???

A few places. All the places. Too many places?

My drama, or stress, or conflict... takes place in my head. I've come to a cross roads, and I've had to think my way through it. My energy has been focused on some personal growth and love and spiritual worship. It's also been focused on "this time of year."

Though we are pagan/wiccan, and for the 16+ years I've been a parent I've tried to carve a different path for us for this time of year, there is STILL this pressure to perform. We do less gift giving than the average family, and this year almost everything that my pixies are getting are hand made. The adults in the family have blessedly decided to forgo gift giving at all, and focus instead on the gifts of bounty and family.

I think my pressure comes from the money pressure. I've been very busy these past few months, and I think the coming quiet time has me a bit nervous. I've been struggling with maintaining a sense of calm and trust-in-the-universe over this. This is the path I've been set on, after all. I"ve manifested all the things we have wished to happen.

I want the rest of the way that we have to go to be joyful, exciting, something to look forward to. And generally I'm incredibly optimistic. The past 2 weeks or so have left me teetering-tightwire-tip toeing with my energy in regards to money. Gotta have it, at the same time, I have just GOT to live my life the way that feels right.

So, that's been my struggle. The universe has put me right where I'm supposed to be; Helping others and making the connections on a deep spiritual level with other souls with confidence and an open loving attitude. I'm not willing to hike what I ask for in return for a reading. How is it helpful if the prices leave it inaccessable?? Although I've been told I don't 'charge enough', I'm comfortable that what I ask for, for a reading, is completely reasonable.

And though I live an extremely frugal lifestyle, there's still bills to pay.

I"m not exactly sure I'm articulating what I'm feeling correctly here.

I have a very full, well rounded life. Life truly is good. I AM love, and I know that's my life-purpose. To just LOVE and be loving and giving. I feel like If I need to pursue the dollar, I'll have to give up my true path. Although I can feed my family happily through growing and bartering, the public utilities aren't so cool about receiving dolls and tarot certificates as payment.

HAHAHAHHA! (COULD you just see the lady's face at the counter - me showing up with a bill to pay, and a box full of art? This really tickles me for some reason.)

Anyway. I'm finding my sense of calm and focus again. A little full moon worship I think has fixed me. I know the answer is to cleave closer to all of you, and the voices in my head, not to pull away and chew nails. ;)

With Much Love,
That's where I've been at!
Lori-Grace